Building the good society in Nigeria: A vision at best

When we talk about buildings in Nigeria, it is hard not to remember structures that keep collapsing time and time again. I must say from research and listening to people who have been in the government for years that ‘building’ or implementing anything is not our forte. Its been said that we usually have very great policies but the well mapped out cookie crumbles as soon as it gets to the implementation phase.

We have all heard about stories of children who at the age of 3 play the piano so well or athletes who have been trained since childhood and excel with perfection at competitions. Now I wonder, perhaps parents have not done enough to teach their children how to build for others hence we do not have the culture or values associated with building ingrained in our makeup.  On the private level, some people excel in Nigeria. Of course not to the best of their abilities and within the limitations they have yet they still rise like Maya Angelou would say. People want to identify with them because they are successful and before you know it, they are thinking ‘Hey, I can run for Governor, President, you know? I have succeeded in running an empire.’

When you look at the people at the helms of affairs, it would do you good to also look at their credentials. Many of these people have excelled in their private lives but it’s a wonder they cannot translate that private success in public success. What then is missing? Is the society so cursed that it cannot get a road built to a worthy standard? We have people who have the technical and operational knowhow and we also have people who can direct processes to achieve great results.

My perception of missing element is that we do not have people – leaders as well as citizens - who have the fundamental values necessary to build up a good society.

                                        

No one can claim he hasn’t had a dream about something. He must have at least imagined life in better circumstances. I cannot make a statement as profound as every Nigerian having a vision for Nigeria because people hardly even have visions for their lives not to mention for their society at large; living from one day to the next, just existing and surviving. I judge not. But to move this nation forward, to move this nation from being a dilapidated building and renovating it by rebuilding, we need to have:           

•              Leaders who are groomed for the role of being a leader in Nigeria and not ‘accidental leaders’. Usain Bolt did not win his races by stumbling on the Olympics and deciding to give it a try. Sometimes, accidental leaders actually get it right, you only need to look at the Fasholas and Gowons of this world and you will see that although they never started out to fill these roles, when they did assume the roles, they took responsibility and made things happen. Let us reflect deeply on why they succeeded or still succeed. My take is they've got values.

•       Citizens with values. That is the missing element in our country. The actions of a person will definitely showcase his values. A leader who has strong values and lives by them is likely to achieve more success than a leader who makes up his values as the situations arise.  If a President has good intentions and is working hard to make sure things work, his success is largely dependent on his executives, ministers etc. If these people do not have values, forget it! A wise President is one who would select his team carefully, not based on political affiliations but on the ability to execute, strong work ethics, shared vision for the Nation and so on.

•       Capable leaders who do not spend their time insulting the every effort of the President and his team whether they are doing a bad job or not. People on the side lines are usually the people who criticize. Criticism is good if it is constructive but when it’s about insults and encouraging young people to ridicule the authorities that be…let’s just say, in the future, you do not want such people at the helms of affairs again whether they have succeeded in the past or not.

At this point, I am thinking that we need to train young minds, like al-Qaeda does train its young soldiers or suicide bombers, wiring and rewiring their minds to know what values are, coaching them to be leaders of thought and preparing them for life as we know it in Nigeria. Maybe then, we can learn to build a good society. As it is, all we can have of a good society is a vision at best. 

WHOM SHALL WE FEAR?

In the wake of the bomb blasts in the North and road accidents in the South, the crashing of the Dana Air craft still came as a shocking reality. Most Nigerians, of course with the exception of boko haram and their sponsors, have had their hearts constrict at the news of the bomb blasts. Then along came the dark clouds that gave us a black Sunday on the 3rd of June 2012. Hearts were broken I tell you. Broken hearts then turned to fiery stones ready to burn anyone affiliated to air travel.

The country has become a fierce inferno and with Asa, the funky musician, I can sing “there is fire on the mountain” but with a slight modification since the only few people running around are the families of the victims of the bomb blasts and crashes. The rest of the people are sighing, lamenting, cursing, avoiding, scampering – which reminds me of what the Holy bible says about those in hell. Nigeria – A hell on earth? The President and his people are apologising, visiting crash and bomb sites, firing top officials and hiring new ones, working on population control, listening to tapes in the House and getting vexed at Otedola and trying to see if Farouk is worth saving and praying as well.

For security sake, I wonder where we can hide in Nigeria. Almost all major roads are dangerous – filled with pot holes, cracks and devilish humans with the aim of robbing and killing. If you decide to go by train, where they exist, there is the possibility of the tracks being washed away by the rain as it currently happened along Ogun state. If you think about ferry rides, don’t forget to think about your will for you do not know when the tides will be high and toss everyone into the waters and thus you would become one of the statistics of the harsh realities of life in Nigeria. Wait a minute! The best route is to go through the air for those who can afford it. Don’t hold your breath too long; I can hear you thinking “what if something goes wrong with the plane? You never know.”

You run to the South because the North is hot with the passionate boko haram who managed to learn the western art of bomb making but hate western education. You run from the country’s capital because the bomb happenings are now at the very central Wuse II where you pass through sometimes. You run to Lagos? Because there are no bombs? Well, the rain is carrying people away, the traffic is reducing your quality of life, the water-logged streets are spoiling your vehicle and the stress is just too much.

Where will you find succour? You want a visa? To where? Little do you know that it is not exactly green on the other side. So you have decided that there is nowhere to go and you want to make a change in your Society? You start with cursing the president and mocking his cabinet? Let me remind you that all these things started way before Jonathan came into power. Go and ask Obasanjo or IBB, they will tell you. So you agree it’s a foundation problem. I agree also but what do you do? You call on a National Sovereign conference because you want out and you do not mind cutting off the boko haram-laden states. Have you thought about the consequences of such a conference? There is so much to fear. I can calm you down but please switch on the lights for I will read to you a passage from the book of Psalms…Shoot! There is no electricity.

WISDOM AND THE THEORY OF THE SIDELINES

Have you ever tried looking at a lady from a distance? If you are a man, the chances that you have is a hundred percent – the same goes for women also. The lady in question might be beautiful or maybe not, but you will surely have something to say about what you have observed. At the same time, you cannot be absolutely certain of what you have seen from a distance. Her blouse might be cream but the reflections of the street lights around her make it look like gold. Her hair might be purple but what you see is black. And if you make the mistake of drooling over what you think you are seeing, you are in for a shocker when you finally step up to her, if at all you do. And if you don’t, you walk away dreaming of the black hair goddess dressed in gold. That is a picture of being on the sideline. You do not get to have the facts. You only think you have it and your actions are then based on your false thinking.

Now, if indeed you walk up to the lady, you could easily see that she is beautiful, of course, this is subjective but to a large extent you can tell that she is easy on the eyes. You can also see her cream blouse. You might not see her purple hair if you are color blind, but you can mention that her black hair is lovely and she might giggle at you and say ‘silly, its purple.’ However the story goes, you have come closer, you have made a better assessment, asked questions but most importantly you have your facts right. Now, that is a wisdom that cannot be compared to the wisdom of the sideline.

It is very easy to stand on the sideline to comment. Ask the guy sitting glued to the television cursing a football player for making the wrong move. You can never enjoy such wisdom on the pitch if you are asked to play the game. Ask the President of Nigeria what it feels like to be in the pitch. Ask the person who gets the statement ‘if I were you, I would…’ every time he makes a decision that has an effect on others. Ask yourself also for you have been on the sideline and on the pitch at some time in your life.

My dictionary defines the sideline as a place for uninvolved people and the example it gave was that you can always get opinions on any subject from the sidelines. If you are not involved in anything then you can never be an authority on anything. Quit being a sideliner! Get on the pitch! We can definitely use more guys (referring to both sexes) on the pitch, playing the game, helping to make our dear country better.

Next time you decide to open your mouth to make a comment, critical or not, it is imperative that you have your facts right. This is even more important these days where most people are connected globally by the web and a mass reaction, calm or volatile, can be initiated within seconds of pinging or touching your mouse pad. You could destroy or you could create just by a click. When next you hear that a girl turned into a snake at the hotel in Warri, do not do as sideliners do – believe hearsay so much that they wanted to burn down the hotel. Instead, use wisdom in deciphering if it is possible to have a snake girl and if your senses tell you to probe further, by all means probe and probe till to you know for a fact that the information you have is right. At that point, you can say whatever you want and anyhow you want to.

Photo credit: http://www.film.com/tv/the-ten-best-tv-characters-according-to-hair#fbid=tgdKVJGgLTR

LESSONS LEARNED

At the end of every year, I usually take some time off to examine my life in the past ten to eleven months. There are a lot of great locations around the world where I wish I could get this done like beach resorts in the Bahamas, St Vincent and Grenadines, Brazil and even Obudu cattle ranch in my backyard. “One day,” I say to myself. Let me not get carried away looking at Forbes’ best beach resorts in the world. The reality is that I do not get to go on retreats so I just spend time in the quiet of my habitat, in the confinements of Crib de la Mine and reflect on how well I spent my life. I look at every aspect of my existence on earth; physical, emotional, spiritual and professional life. I tell you, it’s a long look. It was Socrates, the great Philosopher, who said that the unexamined life is a life not worth living. How true! Every person, project, company must review or evaluate how they have done. This is very vital to become better or to improve the way things are with your life, project or company. There is a popular phrase that says that if you do business as usual, you would get the same results. Therefore if you want to experience differences in your life or work, you have to examine your activities so that you can note down what to do differently next time. To constantly evaluate yourself is to open yourself to new possibilities, change and progress. At this point I say "TM" because I have never heard this saying anywhere, I am sure someone must have thought it, evaluated it but I have articulated it, so "TM".

The first thing I usually do is to recall the goals and resolutions I set at the beginning of the year. Over the years, I have seen the wisdom of SMART goals. At this point I give kudos to my teachers that taught me about making goals Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Time bound. When I have done this, I try to write a list of all the activities that I carried out this year and then I start to match these activities with my goals to see how much I have accomplished in accordance with my set goals. A lot of times, I find out that there are some activities I engaged in that were not planned for but I list them as part of my accomplishments. There were also activities planned for that was not carried out. For these activities I either strike them out or carry them over to the following year depending on how high they fall on my priority list. When I have done this, it is also noteworthy to mention that it is expedient to go through the things that have been achieved and evaluate how well you excelled at each of them. Sometimes it is not enough to just say you did something. I have a magnet on my fridge that says, “Every morning, I exercise up and down, up and down and then the other eye lid.” You have to ask yourself, “Did I carry out my activities to the best of my ability? Did I use all resources at my disposal to produce the results that I got? It is then important to write out the things you did so well that you would want to repeat in the future and things you could have done better and differently. These are the things I refer to as the lessons learned. This process is usually bitter sweet. It can bring both happiness and disappointment in oneself but you must remember that there is always room for kaizen – continuous improvement.

I have not started this process of examination but sometimes you start to learn your lessons from day 1 of the year. The three biggest lessons I have learnt so far are: One, never JUDGE anyone. Judging, I can assure you, is a sweet task to do. You get to over-analyze another human’s behavior. If you like you could even go as far as to analyze why they act the way they do going back into the person’s past as if you were there. You become an unauthorized psychologist, an unpaid one for that matter. Of course I have stories and experiences to back this up and will share them another time. The second lesson I learned is the importance of being tolerant. I find that it is a virtue both necessary for my faith and my personal growth as an individual with a desire to establish good relationships with myself, women, men and organizations. The third of the lessons is the art of silence. Knowing when to speak and with whom to speak to are very crucial in all ramifications of life. Sometimes the person you deem wise enough to reveal your mind to at this minute might not be the person you need to bare your soul to at the next hour. Be Wise! I know we have been given the freedom of speech but we have to be very careful. It is just priceless to learn this art on your own as compared to being taught by life.

Finally, I will not hesitate to praise and reward myself for the good things I have accomplished this year. At this point, I encourage you to praise and reward me in tangible ways especially with the advent of Christmas which is a time to give and show love. I will also encourage myself to do better next year. I refuse to punish myself for things I have not done right because I am not perfect and I can only aspire to be better. When I have accomplished all this, I will certainly make concrete plans for the following year for he who fails to plan, plans to fail. At this point, I cannot say "TM" because Winston Churchill said this during the World War II and it is very much documented.

My Name Is................

I remember watching the movie ‘my name is Khan’ directed by Karan Johar and enjoyed it. The hero of the movie had a need to identify who he was so that he would not be judged or treated unfairly. ‘My name is Khan and I am not a terrorist.’ Rizvan Khan said over and over again. The movie struck a chord in my heart and made tears almost roll down my cheeks. I said to myself ‘what kind of situation would make me scream out or speak out ‘“My name is Yeside and I am not corrupt.” ’ How bad a situation that would be! How bad for those who experience such now! I am however lucky that I have an identity. Not just an identity, an Identity recognized by law.

I was at a meeting recently where they discussed birth registration. At first, I asked myself what good the meeting will be. As I sat glued to the chair, the speaker, a representative of the chairman of the National population commission, discussed the importance of civil registration and its benefits. Of all he said, what struck me the most was that a person whose birth is not registered in Nigeria does not exist. To not exist means not to be alive. Visualize yourself standing in the midst of a crowd. Everyone is walking around you. There is no friendly face in sight and no one gazes at you. You enter a shop to pick up a snack and you shout ‘hello, can I have a doughnut?’ but no one responds. They talk as if you are not there. That is because you are not there. Your voice cannot be heard, you simply do not exist.

In 2010, it was estimated that there would be about 5 million births in Nigeria and at the end of the year records showed that only about 1, 050, 604 births were registered. What happened to the rest of the 4 million children born? Not quite existing? Research has shown that children who are unregistered are often children whose parents are displaced due to war or civil conflicts, children from localities where there is low awareness of birth registration, especially rural and remote communities, as well children born in very poor families, orphans or children whose parents have separated, divorced or widowed and children of single mothers/teenage mothers/out of school girls children born by abused or sexually exploited girls and women. Do not say to yourself ‘But I talk to people, I buy drugs, I can buy food because I speak and can be heard and no one would ask for a birth certificate before any transaction. Besides, what good will a birth certificate do for you?’

We are all created by God, we all do exist but LEGALLY anyone whose birth is not registered does not exist. He or she is not eligible for healthcare, admission into school, voting, obtaining a passport, employment, etc. If such a person is trafficked for the purpose of labor or prostitution, that individual cannot be defended legally because his/her identity is in question. Would they be able to say that you are a Nigerian? You could pass as someone from Niger or Cote d’ Ivore or Ghana. You would not be identified by your tribal marks or your gapped teeth neither can you say you are a Nigerian because you speak Hausa, Yoruba, Igbo, Gbagyi, Gwari. The benefits of vital registration are many and should not be undermined. Encourage your friends, co-workers, helpers, labourers, every one you know, to register their children and get themselves registered.

Birth registration is a permanent and official record of a child’s existence. It is the first step towards recognizing a child’s inalienable right as a human being. Rizvan Khan, though he had Asperger’s syndrome, knew who he was and what he stood for. Like him, I can proudly say that my name is Yeside and I am a Nigerian. If you have any doubts about this, please take a short trip to Ebute Metta and check the records there.

QUOTA COUNTER!!!

Nigerians worked hard to ensure that their votes counted in the recently concluded elections. This goes to show that as a people, we can achieve greatness if we set our minds to it and if we have the right push factors working for us. Building a nation has never been an easy task. You only need to read from history to understand that Rome was not built in a day. Our Nation, Nigeria, needs more than building. You can compare it to a ‘Molue’ that has its lights blown and the belly close to the ground groaning as it tries to climb hills. It needs new body parts, repairs and maintenance. Or better still liken it to a lover who has been badly beaten and wounded. She needs to get out of a bad relationship, get healed of her wounds and start making choices that would only bring her good.

To achieve the great Nation that Nigeria deserves to be, all hands have to be on deck. We cannot elect a president and governors and expect them to do everything. The power belongs to the people (not in the PDP kind of way). It is essential to note that with Power also comes responsibility. As a people, everything we do or not do has implications on our society.
Recently, we celebrated the workers day and an important point to reflect on is ‘What are you contributing to make Nigeria a better place?’ We should learn to see Nigeria as our own and not the governments or the minorities who dictate what happens. When you own something, you care for it.

WORK
Our work should be a vocation and not just a job. A vocation is a calling. You should derive pleasure doing what you do. By finding happiness in what you do, you give it everything you have. It was Martin Luther King, Jnr that said “If a man is called to be a street sweeper, he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say, here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.” Unfortunately, a lot of people have a misplaced sense of what work should be. Our work should be more than just the income it brings and the bills it pays. We spend ¾ of our lives doing our work. If we spend that amount of time doing jobs we hate, we would have a lot to regret at the end. It would be a sad thing to have a lot to regret when we should be celebrating fulfilled lives. Your work should be something you do quite well and with gusto, it does not have to be high paying – a lot of things in life are more important than money. If you ask a younger person, they would disagree but when you speak to elderly people who have gone through life they will assure you that money is not the source of happiness or fulfillment. Everyone who does his work to the best of his ability contributes his quota to building Nigeria.

DIGNITY IN LABOUR
Farmers are people who feed the world, yet Farming is a profession that a lot of people avoid. Nannies are people who bring up children in our society yet they are treated shabbily and with disdain sometimes. These are people who contribute their quota to developing our nation. There are a lot of other occupations that are deemed as non-dignifying, but go a long way to make life better for Nigerians. We need to change our attitudes and start appreciating these people who do ‘odd jobs’. For instance, the street sweeper who does a shabby job, sweeps refuse into the drainage instead of packing it into the garbage truck for disposal at the dunghills. This action would lead to blocking of the drainage, breeding of mosquitoes that cause malaria, contribute to degradation of the roads, cause traffic and hence reduce the productivity of the workforce. Such a sweeper has contributed to damaging the Nation instead of building. We need to take the time to understand the consequences of not doing our work well so that we can renew our minds.

REWARDS
The words from proverbs read “See a man diligent in his duties? He shall stand before kings and not before mean men.” Working hard and working smart is essential for being successful at what you do. Sometimes, even when we have work that we feel great doing, the social vices such as corruption, indiscipline make it hard to achieve much. This leaves a bitter taste in our mouths and brings us to the crossroads: fight and face the consequences or join in if you cannot beat the system. I encourage you to dare to be courageous. If we want to achieve greatness, like the wounded lover, we have to step out of a bad relationship, get healed and start making good choices – no matter how painful they are or the magnitude of sacrifices we have to make.

The last admonition I have is that as a country we need to have faith, not the kind that keeps us on our knees and lays our responsibility on God but faith that would spur us on to action, lead us to the taps of courage and like the bearded Moses of old, bring us to points where we can divide the daunting Seas because anything is possible if we just believe.

CHANGE HAS COME!!!

My Fellow Nigerians, TODAY we shall cast our votes for the man who we think is the most acceptable of the lot. A lot of messages and emails have circulated like wild fire casting doubts in our minds about each of the 'most likely to win' candidates. We have deliberated on who will be the candidate that would, like in the cartoon Superted, sprinkle some cosmic dust and bring Nigeria back to ‘life’. Would it be the General, the lecturer or the policeman?

Most Nigerians are tired of the ‘one-party’ system we have had and hope that perhaps someone from another party will bring the change we so desperately desire. I have this to say: Change has already come. Nigerians have woken up from their slumber, perhaps still drowsy but eyes have been opened. We are holding on to our rights and casting our votes. Of course there is the doubt that creeps into our minds that our votes would not count but people are rising up against all odds to cast their votes. If you don’t call it change, give it a name then.

Change for us will be gradual. We may not succeed in changing the system this time around but we have started changing ourselves. The saying that change must first come from within before it spreads is quite true. We are gradually dropping our laidback attitude. Everyone is talking, arguing, fighting about who should be voted for but most importantly we are making choices. The days when we would just fold our hands and say ‘shout from morning till night, the leaders will embezzle and there is nothing we can do about it’ is receding to the past gradually. Change does not necessarily have to begin from the top, it can start with us and so it has.

When we finally get a president (i am beginning to think that a lecturer, general or policeman would not matter because the people are getting stronger but prove me wrong) from this credible election (hopefully credible),we will not just sit back and let him do as he pleases. We will speak out more through every channel we have and demand that we are treated right. My great Nigerians, change has comes to us, albeit slowly, but it surely is here.